Cal has a secret. One that makes loving him come with a price, and

being his wife cost more than I bargained for

So, this review might be a little jumbled but bear with me.   In all this time that I’ve read  this series, I realize I not once posted reviews about it.  I am talking about the If I Break Series by Portia Moore.

There are three major books available, a mid series book Before I Break 1.5 (between one and two) and book 4 that is to be released on April 30.   In my reviews below, I will be sharing:  If I Break, Before I Break 1.5, Almost Broken, and Beautifully Broken.  Our newest,  Shattered Pieces will have its own post.


This is not your typical happily ever after… Lauren Brooks wants to do three things: Escape the small town she grew up in, get accepted to her dream school in Chicago, and graduate without drowning in debt. Now she’s working her ass off to do just that. With a full course load and a waitressing job at one of the hottest night clubs in Chicago. She does not have time for distractions; namely ones who only want to get into her pants. She’s been burned before. Only a fool goes for a second round.. With just two semesters left until graduation, everything’s on track. And that is when she meets…him.

“Fresh off of a broken heart I met Cal Scott.

He was just what I lacked, a beautiful distraction.

At six-foot-two, with ebony hair, storm gray eyes, and a smile that
could only hide an agenda, I knew he was trouble. And for the first
time in my life, a little trouble was just what I needed.

No. What I wanted.

It wasn’t like I’d ever marry the guy.
Until I did.

What I thought would be my happily ever after, was only the beginning.”

I’m not going to lie, the reason I first started reading the first book was because it was 1) FREE and 2) I knew it was a romance with lots of good reviews.  When I read that first chapter though, I was immediately hooked.  Portia chose her words well and knew how to keep her story interesting from start to finish and I became so obsessed that I read the first two books in one day.  At the time, Beautifully Broken (book 3) hadn’t been released yet so I pre-ordered it and had to just sit and wait.  When It finally released I had finally felt complete. 😛

Honestly, I can’t say there is anything in book one (or all of them) that I dislike.  The story is captivating, dramatic, romantic and will blow your mind with the outcomes.  “If I Break” is NOT your typical romance.  It’s heartbreaking, very real and there are women out there that can 100% relate to this on a deeper level.  Lauren meets Cal at her job after finding out her boyfriend was cheating on her.  She was attracted to him but knew there was something secretive about him.  Either way, she decided to date him and eventually marry him.  Then, after the marriage, the problems begin.  Secrets are kept, fights occur all the time, but there is so much crazy love in between.

  I wish I could tell you more what the book is about but where is the fun in that? 😉  If I Break is available now in AMAZON for free.  I suggest you download your copy today! I mean, what have you got to lose?

1.5- Before I Break  “Cal’s Story” 

Authors Note:Though this could be read as a stand alone, I highly recommend reading the first book in this series titled ‘If I Break’ first.

Out of the past six years of my life, I only remember about half of it. After a dozen doctors and thousands in medical bills, I was diagnosed with a rare neurological disorder–one that causes me to lose track of time. Sometimes it’s hours, days or even weeks with no recollection of anything. The good thing is it’s been almost two years since I had my last ‘black out’. It sounds much better than what the doctors refer to them as, ‘episodes’, like my life is a freaking comedy.

During those two years of normal, I finally managed to get my Bachelor’s degree, a job I love, and I’ve just proposed to a woman who has been there for me through it all. For the first time in a long time everything is on track.

Until a strange woman shows up at my door—she says I’m her husband and I think she’s crazy. Until, I get a voice mail on my phone. It’s from a guy name Cal. The weird part is, it’s the same name the strange woman called me. What terrifies me, is this guy Cal…his voice sounds just like mine.

You still with me guys?  I hope so because this is where it gets crazy!  ***Spoiler Alert***

So we know Cal leaves Lauren at the end of book one.  She is pregnant and alone with no idea where he ran off to and why.  But before we get into what she does when she finds him,  lets talk about Cal in Before I Break.

Book 1.5 is basically what has happened since Cal “checked out” and goes back to being Chris.  What he ends up doing with his life and who he meets during his time away from Lauren.  But as you can guess, life obviously will not come easy for him.  Lauren shows up and reveals that they are married and have a child together, and he is going to have to come to terms with what is really happening in his head..

I really recommend reading “Before I Break” if you want more insight on Chris and to find  out how he falls in love with her all over again.  It’s a short novella so what do you have to lose? 😉

Before I Break (If I Break 1.5) by [Moore, Portia] GET ME HERE!!


Lauren Brooks fell in love with Cal Scott at twenty one, married him at twenty two and had her heart broken at twenty three when he walked out of their marriage. At twenty five, while raising their daughter on her own, Lauren is finally moving on with her life…until she learns the reason for Cal’s abandonment. The walls she had carefully built around her begin to collapse. The day she meets Chris, all those feelings she thinks she has bottled up tightly come spilling out. She can’t afford to give in to her heart’s desire again. Love nearly broke her once, and her daughter doesn’t need two broken parents. Christopher Scott is in love and newly engaged to Jenna, who saw him through an illness he didn’t think he could survive. He’s finally settling into the life he’s always wanted, and he’s making plans he only dared to dream before now. That’s when a woman named Lauren arrives on his doorstep. She’s intriguing, beautiful and, try as he might, he can’t stay away. The closer he gets to her, the more his rock-solid plans begin to crumble. All he knows is that Lauren is the missing piece to a puzzle he must solve. For him to put all the pieces in place, he’ll have to follow his heart, and that might cost him everything…

So after reading 1.5, we find out what Cal been up to since leaving Lauren.  Cal is actually Chris, a man that suffers from DID(Dissociative Identity Disorder)-A disorder characterized by the presence of two or more distinct personality states.  Cal found out that his mother was sick, so he allowed Chris to come back to care for her. Two years later, Lauren shows up telling him he is married and with has a daughter with her.  I love book two because we get a lot of Chris’s perspective.  He starts to remember things of his life with her.  The only thing about Chris I don’t like is that he is a very sensitive person.  But maybe it’s because I was so used to Cal’s harsh personality.  He was conceited, moody, arrogant and selfish while Chris is sweet, calm, easy going and more open.  Book two is more of just Lauren and Chris getting to know each other and figuring out how they are going to do the co parenting thing.  What he didn’t realize, is that he wants to know more of Lauren not just their daughter.  The issue is Jenna, Chris’s now fiance.  How can Chris marry Jenna and still be married to a stranger?

So not  much really happens in book two.  It’s more of a transition phase for our duo.  The ending though will surprise you.  It definitely is an “OMG” moment.

Almost Broken: If I Break #2 by [Moore, Portia]  Get your copy HERE!!

Book Three- Beautifully Broken

The first book in the series is currently free.

Cal’s back and his arrival changes everything.

Lauren knew it was coming but what she didn’t think he’d bring with him was an ultimatum.

A choice.

One that Lauren feels trapped under. A choice she’s unsure will make a difference but could possibly change everything.

The ultimatum isn’t the only thing Cal’s got with him but answers. The ones Lauren so desperately craves. But the truth won’t only affect the lives of him and Lauren but everyone around them…and not everyone wants the truth to come out.

The thing is Cal doesn’t give a F…

…There are two sides to every story. In this one there’s three.

Soooo you still with me?  Wow, at the end of book two, Cal is back, and he couldn’t come back at a more awkward time.  Chris and Lauren have finally let each others feelings known.  She told him that she loves Chris for him, not Cal.  I guess Cal didn’t like that very much.  now she has to deal with the dark moody man again and little does she know, he has an agenda this time.  There is something Cal knows and intends to do something about it.  Lauren is trying to figure out what could cause the whole family to implode while figuring out what it is Cal is trying to do.

there is a ton of suspense in book three and we get more info on the past.  The story goes back and forth from the present to back when Cal and Lauren met.  I think knowing what I know now really made me love Cal.  He isn’t just out for himself.  he truly does love Lauren.  There is nothing I don’t like about book two.  It has the romance, turmoil of DID, suspense and the finale is more than I could bear! Chris finds out that his dad was sleeping with his best friend Lisa.  His dad was CHEATING on his mom.  He didn’t remember though because it was then that Cal had come out.  Chris had finally snapped and let hell break loose on his dad and told everyone Mr. Scott’s secret.  Well I gave you that big spoiler but also, there is another one I will let you read for your self 😉

Beautifully Broken: If I Break #3 by [Moore, Portia] Get book three here